DISINTEREST IN A MEAGER EXISTENCE
DISINTEREST IN A MEAGER EXISTENCE
God cried the moment I was born.
He must have.
I’m 30 and I haven’t accomplished anything worthwhile. I married a wonderful woman and had two lovely daughters, but found myself mired in a thankless job where I couldn’t even leave a mark on my industry, much less contribute to the betterment of mankind. I was an ordinary man.
I’m 40 and find I’m still a dreamer, wishing I had more money and had more things to share, but I thank God every day for my family. And I prayed I could have done more to make Him happy. I wish I could have been extraordinary.
Now I’m 50 and rarely get excited about anything, having exchanged my dreams for regrets. My wife still loves me and my girls have grown to be marvelous Christians, and all are proud of me. But I can’t really understand why. I’ve helped friends and customers and strangers, but not nearly enough, and in no way could that amount to much.
God must be crying still when He looks down at me.
When I turned 60, I tried to be content by putting in an honest quality day’s work, but I’ve never saved a soul nor changed a life by performing a selfless act, nor have I made the world a better place to live.
I retired at 70 and volunteered more at the church and spent more happy times with my wife, my children, and my grandchildren, a luxury I was denied while I toiled relentlessly for others for pay and rewards that never seemed to be enough.
The moment I died I saw God, and as I expected, He was still crying.
I was overjoyed at having achieved a fate I didn’t deserve, and I cowered in His presence because of the shortcomings and failures in the life I had been given.
Then He smiled and embraced me to His bosom with love, and I wept.
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